Mom, Mountains and Me

Note: A healthy bond between parent and child is one of the most important attachments we form. This can set the stage for all future relationships starting with friendships, then romantic relationships and finally the bonds we share with our own children.

Today I pay tribute to my own mother. I talk a lot about my kids and my devotion to them, but today my mom weighs heavily on my mind.

By the time my mom was 45 years old she was dependent on an oxygen machine, confined to a wheelchair. Sadly, she spent the majority of the last ten years of her young life bedridden, in and out of hospitals.

Why today is she weighing so heavily on my mind? I spent the last few days with the people I love most in the world hiking in Rocky Mountain National Park. Because of the high altitude and steep ascents there were times when breathing for me was a challenge. Even just taking a few steps could be difficult. As I would gaze ahead at the climb I still had before me I could clearly see my mother and the the many times she would have to stop, unable to breath, looking ahead at the few steps needed to make it to the bathroom. Oddly, it's in these moments that I feel connected to her. I think of her courage, strength, determination and her will to make those last few steps. And so I carry on, grateful for my lungs and for every breath that I take that allows me to propel forward. Thankful that my body allows me to accomplish these things at 51 years old, just four years younger than my mother when she died.

I like to think that somehow she can see me, but knowing my mother, she thinks I'm a little crazy for these climbs, marathons or whatever challenges I choose to put my body through. Nonetheless, I hope that she is not only proud but in awe of me just as I am in awe of my own children.

I love you more, mom.